I went for my three month check up at the mental health doctor and they weigh me there. I had no idea what my weight was going to be. I was very nervous. Turns out I am down 6 pounds since I went to the doctor last! Slowly but surely I will do this!
I finally got settled enough in my new house to try to bring the treadmill in the house. We just got it done and I am thrilled.
I have been MIA for a while, and I have not been eating so great in that time, or working out. I quit Weight Watchers because I can’t afford it. I don’t think I need it to eat right. I just have to keep myself accountable.
Today is a new day and I am ready to tackle it!
On my last entry I put my weight and measurements up for the world to see. It was a hard thing for me to put it up there and admit to the world that I am that big and that unhealthy. If I want to really do this I need to put it up there. Show where I started from.
My weight was really a slap in the face last time I went to the psychiatrist, I was 4 pounds away from 300. I do not want to pass that mark on the scale. It scared me. A lot. It woke me up that I need to really do something about it and not just sit around and keep getting bigger.
I bought some running shoes today. $62. That is a lot of money to me. I am trying to think of it as an investment in my future. A lot of money that I am scared that I am going to waste. I know I am going to try and work out and lose the weight. I just hope I can stick with it this time. I have tried so many times to lose weight and get healthy. Sometimes it worked and I lost some weight, but something always gets in the way or I give up cause it is too hard.
The last time I had some success was when I was doing this DVD called Yoga for Indie Rockers. It is fairly fast paced yoga set to good music and taught by a tattooed chick. I loved the idea of it and I stuck with it for a good while. I am the least flexible I have ever been and the heaviest I have ever been. Those two things are not good for yoga. I am thinking that I am going to start doing the yoga DVD again. It is something for me to do till I get to I can use a treadmill. That way I feel like I am doing something to lose weight and get in better shape. It is killing me to be sitting here with all this energy, need, and potential to work out and not be able to. So, I will be adding in the yoga DVD to my workouts and before my workouts start on the treadmill. I have got to do something. Sitting here and just getting bigger and bigger is killing me, literally.
I now have a plan. I will try to the yoga at least three times a week till I move then I will add in the treadmill and maybe do the yoga on days when I don’t use the treadmill. I want to keep the yoga at least once a week once I move. I like doing it.
I have to stop worrying about the price of the shoes. It is an investment in me. I need to see me as something worth investing in.